Aint no need to go outside...
But Baby, You hardly even notice
When I try to show you this
Song is meant to keep ya
From doing what your supposed to
Like waking up too early
Maybe we can sleep in
Ill make you banana pancakes
Pretend like its the weekend now
And we could pretend it all the time
Cant you see that its just raining
Aint no need to go outside
But just maybe, laka ukulele
Mommy made a baby
Really don't mind the practice
Cause your my little lady
Lady lady love me
Cause I love to lay here lazy
We could close the curtains
Pretend like there's no world outside
And we could pretend it all the time
Cant you see that its just raining
Aint no need to go outside
Aint no need aint no need Mmmm MMmmm
Cant you see cant you see
Rain all day
And I don't mind.
The telephone is singing
Ringing its too early
Don't pick it up
We don't need to we got everything
We need right here
And everything we need is enough
Just so easy
When the whole world fits inside of your arms
Don't really need to pay attention to the alarm
Wake up slow, yeah wake up slow
You hardly even notice
When I try to show you this
Song is meant to keep ya
From doing what your supposed to
Like waking up too early
Maybe we can sleep in
Ill make you banana pancakes
Pretend like its the weekend now
And we could pretend it all the time
Can't you see that it's just raining
Aint no need to go outside
Aint no need, Aint no need
Rain all day and I really really really don't mind
Can't you see cant you see,
You gotta wake up slow
2 Jobs+School hasn't been easy. I leave home 7am and come back 11:30pm, 5 days a week.
There is no more "work hard, play harder", now on it's just work hard, sleep deeply!
And I'm not talking about the U.S./Brazil bullshit this time, I am talking about choices of love.
That day that I found out that you were an asshole, and decided that I would never forget it and/or forgive you.
What if I was wrong? What if it was all my damn fault?
Why do you keep coming back to me?
Do you wanna blame me? Go ahead!
But keep in mind that I blame you for all that happened, and I hate you for that.
But I still miss you, every little thing, every single day.
Even tho I know I'm being silly, I thought you should know..
I don't even know where to start.
It's been easier than the last time, today was the first day that I really missed the States. Idk if it was because I had a huuuuge fight with my parents about my car (I hate my car! It's brand new, 0km, flex, perfect, and MANUAL!), but today I cried.
I cried because I felt lost, and I just don't wanna feel lost, not now.
I'm loving school, but I started to hate São Paulo, and that crazy city life thats going on here.
I hate driving 1hour to school at 5:30pm, and 10min at 11:30pm back home. The traffic is INSANE!
I hate the idea that my parents are paying my college, but they kinda poke me every single day to get a job.
I want to move to Florianópolis, soooooo bad.
Maybe at the end of the year, if I get in some shitty school there I will move, and fuck FAAP. I'm looking for a better life.
I can't stand the brazilian dudes, they are disgusting. I think I'll never be able to date a brazilian again, and I'm dead serious.
(ok, if he was my surfer dude from new years eve I'd be totally down! but well..)
I quit smoking! ! !
And my next plan is to quit drinking. (Hell Yeaaaah!)
I love soccer! How I missed it!
Driving a Ford Explorer and then changing to a New Ford Ka is DRASTIC! Don't try it!
I'm going to Bonete in 40 days.. to spend the whole week, I sooooo need some rest at my Island doing nothing.
I wish you could come..
Exhausted.
I can't wait to go home!
My car broke last night, and I'm fucked.
I found out that I don't like Baltimore anymore, but it was good seen Vivi.
It was frustrating seen that some things and people will never change tho. (And it has nothing to do with Vivi.)
4 weeks.
And I'm wishing that the time goes fast..
I've been in my own world, that is made up of lies and masks. I'm trying to hide, so I won't get hurt. I try to not hurt you either, but I think I've been doing it by the wrong way.
I'm lost and I don't know who to call. I hate the clock.
I need help, but I don't know what kind. I won't ask you, because you should know by now. I've been holding tears.
For those who still don't know, YES, I'm going back to Brazil. August 1st.
Why?
School, School, School! I finally got into the College that I always wanted, The Fifth Best Film School in the World!
Once again it is going to be hard to say goodbye. But anyway, I came back, saw almost everyone that I wanted to see, had a blast, met a lot of cool people, and guess what? I still have 10 weeks!
So no tears for now (Did u hear that right Luana? lol). You all know me, I can come back whenever I want, and you all can go to Brazil and stay with me whenever you want.
For now that is it.
The weekend is almost here, real bowling and wii bowling sound just perfect to me. I think I don't like to party no more! ;)
What a weekend!
Jersey was just perfect, working the next day 15 hours wasn't so perfect tho. I miss my babe. I have a cut on my neck that is killing me, I haven't slept good in a while, I've been working more than I wanted. I've learned how to make Annapolis-Bel Air in 40min lol. And I'm having such a blast with u girls.
Gotta love the Orsies.
so I can say 'this is the way that I used to be
there’s no substitute for time
or for the sadness
split screen sadness"
once i said that but today i would only say: Split screen sadness..
Bmore-Jersey-Naptown.. talk to you all later.
I had a great weekend, Friday with my girls at Dead Freddies (and I have to say that it has been my favorite place lately.). Then I spend my whole Saturday with Ariane at IKEA and C Mart trying to find furnitures for her new place (and I have to say that DEF Ariane and I have different tastes, THANK GOD. ;P), Saturday night in the woods with Vivi, Thalissa and the boys, LOVELY, the only bad thing was that I had to work in Annapolis 9am, and I went to bed 6:12am. ;)
Well, I'm already counting the days until Thursday
"2008 had arrived. together came a sunny bonete, meeting new people, crazy new years eve, rest at the beach for more couple of days and come back home with the plans up side down.
and for those who came back for good find out that you no longer belong to your own place it is pretty weird. but telling you that i'm going back and knowing that you will be there to get me at the airport doesn't seem to be a bad start for the year."
(a note that I found with the date: 01/08/08).
Do you have any pets?
Yes, one in Brazil, one here.
What color shirt are you wearing?
Red.
Name three things that are physically close to you:
My laptop, my phone and a glass.
What is the last book you read?
The Lord of The Rings, for the fifth time.
What's your favorite sport?
Soccer.
Do you enjoy sleeping late?
Waaaaay too much.
What's the weather like right now?
Too cold for me.
Who tells the best jokes?
IDK, maybe Vivi?
What was the last thing you dreamed about?
That I was getting Bowen of the bus under the rain. Weird!
Do you drive? If so, have you ever crashed?
Yessss, couple of times.
Do you believe in karma?
Yes, and I have one, and he usually go out at Federal Hill. lol
Do you like your eggs scrambled or sunny side up?
Scrambled, please.
Do you collect anything? If so, what?
I have a lot of random stuff in my wallet, and they all mean something, but I wouldn't say that I collected them.
Are you proud of yourself?
Could be more.
What's your favorite food?
Sushiiiii.
Do you like the smell of gasoline?
Hate it.
Do like to draw?
Love it.
Is your room messy?
Yessss, but today is thursday, cleaning day.
What do you like better: oranges or apples?
Apples.
Are you a good guesser?
I guess so. ;)
Can you read other people's expressions?
Yes, waaay too much. And believe me, I don't like it.
Do you have a job?
Yes I do.
What time did you wake up this morning?
10:30
What did you eat for breakfast this morning?
French Toast with Iced Latte, that I made myself.
When was the last time you showered?
Couple minutes ago.
What do you plan on doing tomorrow?
Fridaaaaaay, going to Baltimore prob.
What's your favorite day of the week and why?
Fridaaaay, just because.
Have you ever been scuba diving?
Yes, but I'm not a big fan of the ocean.
What's your least favorite color?
Red.
Is there someone you have been constantly thinking about? If yes, who?
Yeah, but let's just not talk about it.
Would you ever go skydiving?
Nooooo way.
What toothpaste do you use?
Colgate (?)
What's the worst injury you have had?
Well, I broke my left foot 3 times, and my left thumb once. All of them was kinda bad.
What's the last movie you saw?
Lars and the real girl.
What do you want to know about the future?
Where I'm going to live.
What does your last text message say?
"I guess not?"
Who was the last person you spoke over the phone to?
Simon
What's your favorite school subject?
Math
What's your least favorite school subject?
History
Would you rather have money or love?
Love is what I got, just remember that.
What is your dream vacation?
Hawaii
What is your favorite animal?
Dogs.
Do you miss anyone right now?
Yeah, a bunch of people.
What's the last sporting event you watched?
Prob the last Caps game. Not sure.
Do you need to do laundry?
Yessssss. Def.
Do you listen to the radio?
Yup, 100.7.
Where were you when 9/11 happened?
At school, Caraguatatuba, SP - Brazil.
What do you do when vending machines steal your money?
Yell at them?
What color are your bed sheets?
Green
What's your ringtone?
Bell 2.
Who was the last person to make you laugh?
Simon/Gary/Tim over the phone last night. They were fucked up.
Do you have any obsessions right now?
A huuuuuuge chocolate please.
What's your favorite fruity scent?
Apple.
Have you ever been to a different country?
Yes.
Name three things in the world you dislike:
Hate banana, hate cheaters, hate cold weather.
Do you hold grudges?
Unfortunately..
I don't really know what I'm doing with my life, but don't worry, I'm not getting in that plane today! ;)
i talk about how i love life
you how you are afraid of death
i talk about the strength of chance
you about luck or not
i'm used to walk in a labirinth
you only walk in a straight line
i invite you to a party
but you only care about getting your goal
your goal is to hit the aim
but, for sure, your aim is not waiting for you
i look to the infinite
and you with your sunglasses
i say "I love you"
and you only believe if i swear
i throw my soul into the space
you have your feet on the ground
i experience the future
while you regret not being what you were
And what you were?
your goal is to hit the aim
but, for sure, your aim is not waiting for you
I scream for freedom
you let the door close
i wanna know the truth
and you're concerned about not hurting yourself
i take all the risks
and you say that you don't want it anymore
i offer myself interely for you
but you are satisfied with half of me
your goal is to hit the aim
but, for sure, your aim is not waiting for you
So tell me whats the use in knowing where the road leads?
(this is a brazilian song, that i translated with vivis help!)
And you know what? That just got me more nostalgic than ever.
I've been kinda homesick since then.
But I don't miss my mom, dad, my dog, my brother or friends. I miss what I used to be and it is somehow completely attached to Brazil.
And I will tell you all something: that is noooo good!
But for now, I'm just going to let it roll because I'm more worried about the weekend, after all it is going to be LEGEN.. wait for it.. DARY!
Then I'm back, it is pretty sweet, but also it is fucking weird.
Am I really going to live here? Am I giving up the fifth best Film School in the world to go to Anne Arundel Community College just because "OMG! I love America"?
But I've decided, right? I don't want to raise my children in a place that I know that is never going to change, even in a hundread year, where the goverment wants the people be poor and stupid. BUT, shouldn't I, as a brazilian, try to do something? After all, if I don't try, if nobody tries, it never ever gonna change.
So my final question is:
Because I have the opportunity of living in another country and running away from the brazilian reality, am I being selfish?
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